When it comes to how you feel about yourself, it has a significant impact on how you live and interact with others. If you are self-assured, you tend to perceive yourself positively and truly like spending time with and around other individuals. You don't feel self-conscious or embarrassed in social situations, which allows you to live your life to the fullest and happiest extent possible. But it is thought that 85% of people suffer from low self-esteem at some point in their lives, so if you are struggling, you are not alone.
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| Confidence is taking photos right outside my unit using just my phone and its self timer |
I experienced this right after I experienced a major heartbreak many years ago. The toxicity of that non-relationship led me to doubt myself and caused my self-esteem to crash. I used to be outgoing in school, but that incident affected me and my mental health negatively. I am so glad and relieved to be out of the woods.
Those who find themselves suffocating in a sea of self-doubt, hesitation, and shyness tend to retreat and separate themselves from others, avoiding interactions and connections with other people. Your social anxiety, which you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are with people, is causing you to be much less productive and is detrimental to your emotional health and overall well-being. If you lack self-confidence or have friends or family members who lack confidence, you must take steps to improve your situation.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparisons aren't good, whether you're comparing how you appear to your pals on Facebook or comparing your wage to your friend's income. In fact, according to a 2018 study published in the journal Personality and Individual Differences, there is a direct correlation between feelings of envy and how you feel about yourself.
According to the findings of the study, persons who compare themselves to others develop feelings of envy. And the more they were envious of others, the more self-conscious they became.
Remind yourself of your own accomplishments and talents if you find yourself feeling jealous of someone else's life. Consider keeping a gratitude notebook regularly to help you stay focused on your own life rather than the lives of others.
Focus On Others
If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of your own awkwardness.
For example, think about what is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.
People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really listen to what they have to say.
This habit of focusing more on what you love in others instead of what you dislike in yourself will help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations and instantly make you feel great about yourself.
Change Your Look
You don't need to make drastic changes, but you can benefit from treating yourself to something new that you have coveted for a while now. Maybe you want a new pair of boots, or you bought some Body Jewellery Online for your piercings. Wear the item, make yourself feel good and use this confidence boost you help you get through the day.
An excellent tip for challenging situations is to pamper yourself beforehand; if you feel comfortable and confident in your skin, you will instantly feel better when approaching circumstances that affect your confidence. Avoid choosing outfits that you don't feel comfortable in, as this will have the opposite effect on your confidence.
Alternatively, completely overhauling your style can offer you a chance to overcome your anxiety issues, build your esteem, and reinvent yourself, almost like shedding old skin and growing into a new one.
Surround Yourself With Positivity
Pay close attention to how people around you make you feel about yourself. Do your family and friends help you to grow or hinder your progress? Do they continuously pass judgement on you, or do they embrace you for who you are as an individual?
The individuals with whom you spend most of your time significantly influence your ideas and attitudes about yourself than you may realize. If you feel self-conscious after spending time with someone, it may be time to separate ways.
As a reflection of this, you want to share this positivity with others too. People are more receptive to others, especially those more introverted if they have nine things to say about others. So build up those around you with compliments and see how it is received and reciprocated to give you a quick confidence boost when you need it.
Look After Yourself
How much do you pay attention to your body and what it needS? How you treat yourself to ensure you are fit and healthy can play a massive part in your self-esteem and confidence. Chances are, if you are sleeping poorly and eating the wrong foods, you won't feel so great within yourself. In turn, this will knock down your confidence.
Pay close attention to the foods you eat, how much exercise and fresh air you get, and your sleeping routines. It would be best to aim for around 7-9 hours of sleep each night at regular, consistent times and eat a healthy balanced diet. Everything in moderation is the key to a good diet, eating plenty of more nutritious foods, reducing processed foods and high sugar foods, and drinking around eight glasses of water per day. Doing so will improve your general health, help you feel more alert, and support your body to work on your confidence without running down due to bad lifestyle choices.
Practice Being Assertive
Being assertive is about acknowledging and respecting the ideas and needs of others but also demanding the same in return. An effective strategy is to observe other people who are forceful and then mimic their actions.
It's not about pretending to be someone you aren't when it comes to this. Learning from those you admire while allowing your true self to shine through is what it is all about.
Learn to Say No
People with poor self-esteem frequently feel obligated to say yes to others, even if they do not honestly want to, mostly because they fear rejection.
Saying no does not generally cause problems in interpersonal interactions. But you run the risk of being overloaded, resentful, angry, and depressed due to your experience. It can be beneficial to keep saying no, but in different ways, until they get what you're trying to express.
Accept Yourself
Being aware of your own identity begins with the realization that no two people are the same and that no single social environment is appropriate for everyone. Everyone is endowed with their own set of distinct abilities and ways of expressing themselves. Take pride in yours! When it comes to one-on-one and small group conversations, you might not be as brave and confident as you would be in a larger group.
Introverts, for example, exude calm confidence that is, regrettably, sometimes mistaken for shyness by those around them. They are naturally reserved and prefer to spend their time by themselves. In exchange for this inherent propensity, they are endowed with specific unique abilities, such as the capacity to listen more attentively and notice things that others do not.
Your individuality serves as both a source of strength and competitive advantage. The fact is that you will not be comfortable and confident in all circumstances at all times. Accept this and allow yourself to shine when you can not criticize yourself for being like others in different situations.
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Albert Einstein
Find Something You Enjoy
Exercise, reading, music, riding a bicycle or going fishing are all examples of activities that you should engage in regularly that you actually enjoy, and that brings you genuine happiness. This will, in turn, strengthen your self-belief and increase your confidence by orders of magnitude. It will increase your self-esteem, calm your ego, and allow you to identify with your unique traits and talents.
It is possible that you will not become popular for doing what you enjoy, and it is even possible that you will not desire to become popular at all. Being popular doesn't make you happy; instead, doing what you enjoy makes you happy.
Fake It 'Til You Make It
When it comes to boosting your self-esteem and confidence, it won't be an overnight change; forcing yourself to do things you aren't comfortable with can backfire. Especially if you push too hard, take things slowly, reinforce the changes you want to make and congratulate yourself when you make positive changes.
Fake it 'til you make it is a phrase used by many people in different contexts but in this situation faking your confidence and self-esteem can help you gain what you are looking for and give you a boost when you need it the most. And before long, you will realize you aren't faking it anymore.
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