A new decade comes at the stroke of midnight.
It was a long and tumultuous year, filled with much pain and tears, but happy days always overpower the bad. Still, 2019 left me feeling very tired and I am happy that this year is coming to a close.
My word for this year is being. Among this year's highlights, aside from seeing Carly Rae Jepsen perform live, is learning to not be too concerned about what people may think. It was a process that started since I read Amanda Palmer's The Art of Asking, but I just went full throttle on it. You lose 100% of the shots you didn't take, and it taught me to speak out more, embrace things more completely, and just be.
Here is another one of my favorite memories from this year:
It was a mind-blowing experience and never imagined I would [be brave enough to] experience [seeing as how I drowned initially], and I am looking forward to doing it again.
***
I used to think 30 is so old and I would have my life figured out before I turn 25. Well, I turned 33 this year and some days I still feel lost, like I am on a boat with the shore visible from a distance but without an oar to paddle with, helplessly teetering for balance.
I acknowledge the gifts the Universe brought my way this decade, and I am grateful.
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| J and I on New Year's Eve 2018 |
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| J and I today, New Year's Eve 2019 |
I am so proud of how far J has come. 2019 was his year and I am excited for what 2020 will bring.
***
I don't know if feeling a little bit more jaded as each year passes comes with age and is a normal phase one goes through, or it is because of the times we live in now, or a combination of both. All I know is that times are tough, it's a difficult life, and we all have to be kind to one another.
Most importantly, you have to be kind to yourself.
Happy 2020, my friends.
My annual tradition of posting my Christmas wish list on the first day of December comes a day late because I totally forgot. I didn't want to make one anymore as I don't get every thing on the lists I make anyway but my boyfriend asked me to make one so here it is, I guess. Heh.
I used to make very elaborate wish lists complete with a collage but ever since Polyvore folded I haven't been made aware of any good websites to make them with, so here's a simple accompanying photo.
I used to make very elaborate wish lists complete with a collage but ever since Polyvore folded I haven't been made aware of any good websites to make them with, so here's a simple accompanying photo.
- Pat McGrath Lipsticks
I was supposed to purchase at least two tubes from Sephora's Black Friday sale so I can take advantage of the 15% discount and get a Sephora brush canister set as GWP but I just couldn't justify the Php 2,400 price tag of one tube, let alone two. BUT IT'S SO PRETTY! I have the Pat McGrath Mini MatteTrance Lipstick Trio in Colour Blitz and they have the best matte lipstick formula I have ever tried in my life. The packaging is also very luxurious. I just need a truly big win to justify gifting it to myself, or someone very generous to give it to me as a present. I pored over reviews all weekend and narrowed down my choices to the following: I want the BlitzTrance Lipsticks in Club Kiss, Lady Stardust, and Blood Rush, LuxeTrance Lipsticks in Beauty Junkie and Wrecked, MatteTrance Lipsticks in Elson and Guinevere, and Obsessive Opulence MatteTrance Lipstick in Omi.
- Typewriter
This has been a constant staple in all the wish lists I made since I started making them here on my blog. Will 2019 finally be the year I get one? We wait with bated breath.
- Oven
I want to learn how to bake, or at least ask my sister to bake for me, so this will come handy.
- Silhouette Cameo
I am getting this for myself next year but I am listing it here also so it can be crossed off my list, that I realize is tantamount to adding a task that's already finished to a to do list, heh.
Let it be noted that I also will not be against getting Fully Booked gift cards.
That's it for my Christmas 2019 wish list. It's a nice feeling that I had a challenging time composing one, mostly because I already have most of what I need and want. If there's anything else I pray for, it's good health for me and my loved ones, clarity, and peace of mind.
I wish you a happy December.
I was sick last Saturday but I couldn't have missed Eat Plan Love 2019 for the world. It's a planner party organized by The Philippine Planning Society and it was my first time to go. I didn't think I would be able to get a slot but I did! I already have planners for 2020 but it's always fun checking out what else is in the market. I also love attending events like this because I always look forward to meeting people with similar interests and the loot, of course!
My Eat Plan Love loot!
Look at our planner stack ♥
Look at our planner stack ♥
The event was filled with fun activities raffle draws with awesome prizes, games and contests, delicious food, a talk by Dr. Michele Alignay about planning for well-being and planning well-being, and even a surprise proposal at the end!
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| My table-mates Danica, Lyka, Daykie, Lyriel, and Joanna |
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| ♥♥♥ |
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| I took photos of my planners at the flat-lay station |
The TPPS admins were able to gather a LOT of sponsors who were so generous in making sure our loot bags were filled to the brim with amazing planner stuff and stationery!
Let me share with you the contents of my TPPS bag!
Aside from the grand prize that was drawn separately at the end, all attendees were guaranteed to win a prize from the raffle. I got a Webster's Pages ring binder planner complete with inserts that I have also been wanting to have!
It's a gorgeous gold color and I can't wait to use it!
A lot of sellers were also there and I availed inserts, stickers, tapes, and other things I can't use for my craft projects!
My planner girl heart went home very happy!
Huge thanks to the admins for tirelessly working hard to make sure we get a fun event, and to the sponsors for being so generous! I am so happy I have new friends and new planner loot! I already bought more foils for my foiling machine, and I am so excited to customize my Christmas gifts!
If you like planners and planner-related stuff, come join our Facebook group and be surrounded by like-minded people. Enjoy!
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| I was also one of the grand prize winners of a Heidi Swapp Minc foil applicator! |
Let me share with you the contents of my TPPS bag!
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| I love these personalized magnetic bookmarks, button pin, and sticker labels! |
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| I got these from Danica through our table share |
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| I got these because I was one of the winners of the Instagram contest |
It's a gorgeous gold color and I can't wait to use it!
A lot of sellers were also there and I availed inserts, stickers, tapes, and other things I can't use for my craft projects!
My planner girl heart went home very happy!
Huge thanks to the admins for tirelessly working hard to make sure we get a fun event, and to the sponsors for being so generous! I am so happy I have new friends and new planner loot! I already bought more foils for my foiling machine, and I am so excited to customize my Christmas gifts!
If you like planners and planner-related stuff, come join our Facebook group and be surrounded by like-minded people. Enjoy!
I read this post on Facebook and thought it too beautiful not to share. I'm also lifting the post in its entirety and reposting here for posterity so that I can look back at it every time I need to. I hope you get inspired as well.
Self-care is often a very unbeautiful thing.
It is making a spreadsheet of your debt and enforcing a morning routine and cooking yourself healthy meals and no longer just running from your problems and calling the distraction a solution.
It is often doing the ugliest thing that you have to do, like sweat through another workout or tell a toxic friend you don’t want to see them anymore or get a second job so you can have a savings account or figure out a way to accept yourself so that you’re not constantly exhausted from trying to be everything, all the time and then needing to take deliberate, mandated breaks from living to do basic things like drop some oil into a bath and read Marie Claire and turn your phone off for the day.
A world in which self-care has to be such a trendy topic is a world that is sick. Self-care should not be something we resort to because we are so absolutely exhausted that we need some reprieve from our own relentless internal pressure.
True self-care is not salt baths and chocolate cake, it is making the choice to build a life you don’t need to regularly escape from.
And that often takes doing the thing you least want to do.
It often means looking your failures and disappointments square in the eye and re-strategizing. It is not satiating your immediate desires. It is letting go. It is choosing new. It is disappointing some people. It is making sacrifices for others. It is living a way that other people won’t, so maybe you can live in a way that other people can’t.
It is letting yourself be normal. Regular. Unexceptional. It is sometimes having a dirty kitchen and deciding your ultimate goal in life isn’t going to be having abs and keeping up with your fake friends. It is deciding how much of your anxiety comes from not actualizing your latent potential, and how much comes from the way you were being trained to think before you even knew what was happening.
If you find yourself having to regularly indulge in consumer self-care, it’s because you are disconnected from actual self-care, which has very little to do with “treating yourself” and a whole lot do with parenting yourself and making choices for your long-term wellness.
It is no longer using your hectic and unreasonable life as justification for self-sabotage in the form of liquor and procrastination. It is learning how to stop trying to “fix yourself” and start trying to take care of yourself… and maybe finding that taking care lovingly attends to a lot of the problems you were trying to fix in the first place.
It means being the hero of your life, not the victim. It means rewiring what you have until your everyday life isn’t something you need therapy to recover from. It is no longer choosing a life that looks good over a life that feels good. It is giving the hell up on some goals so you can care about others. It is being honest even if that means you aren’t universally liked. It is meeting your own needs so you aren’t anxious and dependent on other people.
It is becoming the person you know you want and are meant to be. Someone who knows that salt baths and chocolate cake are ways to enjoy life – not escape from it.
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| Art by Pascal Campion |
It is making a spreadsheet of your debt and enforcing a morning routine and cooking yourself healthy meals and no longer just running from your problems and calling the distraction a solution.
It is often doing the ugliest thing that you have to do, like sweat through another workout or tell a toxic friend you don’t want to see them anymore or get a second job so you can have a savings account or figure out a way to accept yourself so that you’re not constantly exhausted from trying to be everything, all the time and then needing to take deliberate, mandated breaks from living to do basic things like drop some oil into a bath and read Marie Claire and turn your phone off for the day.
A world in which self-care has to be such a trendy topic is a world that is sick. Self-care should not be something we resort to because we are so absolutely exhausted that we need some reprieve from our own relentless internal pressure.
True self-care is not salt baths and chocolate cake, it is making the choice to build a life you don’t need to regularly escape from.
And that often takes doing the thing you least want to do.
It often means looking your failures and disappointments square in the eye and re-strategizing. It is not satiating your immediate desires. It is letting go. It is choosing new. It is disappointing some people. It is making sacrifices for others. It is living a way that other people won’t, so maybe you can live in a way that other people can’t.
It is letting yourself be normal. Regular. Unexceptional. It is sometimes having a dirty kitchen and deciding your ultimate goal in life isn’t going to be having abs and keeping up with your fake friends. It is deciding how much of your anxiety comes from not actualizing your latent potential, and how much comes from the way you were being trained to think before you even knew what was happening.
If you find yourself having to regularly indulge in consumer self-care, it’s because you are disconnected from actual self-care, which has very little to do with “treating yourself” and a whole lot do with parenting yourself and making choices for your long-term wellness.
It is no longer using your hectic and unreasonable life as justification for self-sabotage in the form of liquor and procrastination. It is learning how to stop trying to “fix yourself” and start trying to take care of yourself… and maybe finding that taking care lovingly attends to a lot of the problems you were trying to fix in the first place.
It means being the hero of your life, not the victim. It means rewiring what you have until your everyday life isn’t something you need therapy to recover from. It is no longer choosing a life that looks good over a life that feels good. It is giving the hell up on some goals so you can care about others. It is being honest even if that means you aren’t universally liked. It is meeting your own needs so you aren’t anxious and dependent on other people.
It is becoming the person you know you want and are meant to be. Someone who knows that salt baths and chocolate cake are ways to enjoy life – not escape from it.
-Brianna Wiest
When putting makeup on I love playing with different color combinations and checking which colors go best with which. I like rotating my palettes and products so I rarely do the same look more than thrice. While this is the ideal scenario, most days, I am too busy and pressed for time that I can barely take my makeup out of storage let alone compose a whole new different look. Days like this, multi-tasking makeup products are a lifesaver.
For our 51st month together, I asked J for the blk Birthday Sparkle Gloss in Confetti that he willingly obliged to, but of course I just HAD to swatch the other blk products while we were inside the blk Cosmetics Glorietta store. Long story short, aside from the lip gloss I initially wanted, the blk Cosmetics Multi-Tasking Color Stick in Merlot also came home with me.
The Multi-Tasking Color Stick is from blk Cosmetics' Universal line that is universally flattering and caters to makeup enthusiasts regardless of gender and complexion. I love its simple and understated packaging. Uncomplicated beauty, indeed!
This makeup product can be applied as a blush, lip color, eye shadow, and even as a highlighter or contour, depending on the shade. It is creamy, blend-able, and buildable, so you can go from sheer to heavy according to your preference.
Merlot is a medium rosy pink that gives a soft, warm flush from within. Perfect for when I want that fresh-out-of-the-gym look! To use, just dab lightly on your desired areas and blend! I just use my ring finger for this.
Here are some looks using the Multi-Tasking Color Stick on my eyes, cheeks, and lips.
I also used the blk Cosmetics Birthday Sparkle Gloss in Confetti here.
Here are some looks using the Multi-Tasking Color Stick on my eyes, cheeks, and lips.
I also used the blk Cosmetics Birthday Sparkle Gloss in Confetti here.
Minimalist and simple, yet dressy enough for the office.
Another look taken by the window.
I am sooo tempted to also get the shade Champagne, and I would have, if only I didn't have more than enough highlighters to last me until the next two decades.
At Php 399 a pop, the blk Cosmetics Multi-Tasking Color Stick is worth it because of the multiple and versatile ways it can be used. I might still get Champagne as well just because, hee.
Another look taken by the window.
I am sooo tempted to also get the shade Champagne, and I would have, if only I didn't have more than enough highlighters to last me until the next two decades.
At Php 399 a pop, the blk Cosmetics Multi-Tasking Color Stick is worth it because of the multiple and versatile ways it can be used. I might still get Champagne as well just because, hee.
A blink and a sigh, and we have barely two months before a completely new decade descends upon us. If you're in the market for your 2020 planner, may I suggest that you check out Crazy About Paper for Viviamo's lineup of planners for every planner personality? In this post I'll give a flip through of the Belle de Jour 2020 Power Planner. This year's theme is "The Universe is in Me".
I chose the Leather edition and had it customized for an additional fee of Php 50.00. I prefer this year's softbound Leather version because it's more lightweight as compared to last year's.
It's a hard pill to swallow, but I feel like I am wasting most of my days mindlessly going through the motions, looking forward to the next thing to look forward to. I need to live more purposefully and with intention. As the great Stacie Orrico once sang, "There's gotta be more to life [than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me]." And I know I can't expect to find these in a planner, but I hope going deep into my own thoughts, reflecting, and writing them down may help me manifest my wishes and dreams to the Universe, that She may help me achieve them. It's a great coincidence I guess that this year's theme of BDJ Power Planner aligns with my heart's whisper.
On to the flip through?
As always, owner's contact info on the first inside cover page.
I love this manifesto, and it reminded me of a book I got a couple of years ago, Your Illustrated Guide to Becoming One with the Universe by Yumi Sakugawa. I think I need to delve into that book again.
There is value in putting pen to paper, so I am excited to fill out this space for my 2020 Goals. It's also interesting to see what the Krissyfied Solar System will look like after I have tracked my day-to-day moods using different colored pencils.
My Dream Board for my Belle de Jour 2019 Power Planner was filled with nice photos, affirmations, and stickers symbolizing things I wanted to achieve this year and I was able to succeed in getting most of them. I have less than two months to attain the rest, but I am not being too hard on myself in that I won't lose sleep in case I don't get them. ;)
More space for more reflections. I think I'm going to fill these up with my favorite quotes I recently added to my Notes.
I think I'll actually take a stab at filling out my Ikigai for this year.
Every other page in this planner is pretty straightforward, but this section actually left me feeling confused. What am I supposed to do with a law of attraction schedule, and must this schedule be so rigid?
I like jotting down things I am grateful for every day, but I guess I will reserve the Big Things for this section.
More blank space to write on.
I used to write letters to my future self every New Year's Eve and schedule it to be sent out on the following year's New Year's Eve. The company hosting these letters has already folded, but here's a little blast from the past from my email inbox. This letter was written on December 31, 2013, and I received it on December 31, 2014.
Letters to future selves are fun. I think I will convince J to make a time capsule with me. Aside from a photo from the year we make the time capsule and letters to our future selves, I wonder what else we can put in it. A McDo French Fry?
Manual menstrual trackers are not really helpful to me because I use the Clue app for this already, so I'm not sure if I should just cover it with printed paper for more writing space or just leave it as it is.
Monthly View. I understand the colors are more muted to give a watercolor wash effect (that I loved as I love watercolors!) but I hope they're not that muted because I still want to see color. I veered away from BDJ Power Planners a few years back because I didn't like how saccharine and ~cluttered the pages have become so last year's was definitely an improvement. I wish the washes on this year's pages could have been at least a tad darker.
Nevertheless, as you can see below, the monthly dividers are perfection.
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL!!!
If you used a BDJ Planner this year, this Zappar logo may be familiar to you. It offers more value to the BDJ Power Planners as you just have to use the Zappar app to scan this and the page becomes more interactive! I tried to run the app but was advised it's not available yet, so I will try again come 2020.
Weekly View. It's a little better than the Monthly View, but the watercolor wash could've been a little darker just to provide more contrast.
OF COURSE I had to what the April monthly cover looks like because it's my birth month, and it's a curly girl with books! Just put glasses on her and IT ME!
Aside from the two gold-colored ribbons to mark pages, the BDJ 2020 Power Planner also comes with a magnetic bookmark that's also in theme.
More blank pages for Notes.
Bills Tracker that I need to remember to fill out.
And Cash Flow Tracker that I also need to remember to fill out. J uses a Google Sheet and it has been pretty effective for him in helping him manage and remember where his money goes. I tried to do the same along with several other apps but I always forget to note my expenses down. I should include it in my To Do List every day!
What makes BDJ Power Planners more special are the Perks of a Bella Lifestyle Card and coupons! I always enjoy whipping out my Card to get discounts from partner stores, and I'm excited to do the same next year! For a complete list of this year's accompanying coupons, check out Helen's blog post!
The Belle de Jour 2020 Power Planner also comes in Classic, Limited, and Discbound Editions. Check them out together with Viviamo's other planners in Crazy About Paper and choose how you'll write your 2020. They also make excellent gifts to friends and loved ones. ;)
My Belle de Jour 2020 Power Planner in Leather will be my main planner for 2020, while the 2020 Essentials Planner will serve as my journal. New blank slate, new decade, new possibilities!
I chose the Leather edition and had it customized for an additional fee of Php 50.00. I prefer this year's softbound Leather version because it's more lightweight as compared to last year's.
It's a hard pill to swallow, but I feel like I am wasting most of my days mindlessly going through the motions, looking forward to the next thing to look forward to. I need to live more purposefully and with intention. As the great Stacie Orrico once sang, "There's gotta be more to life [than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me]." And I know I can't expect to find these in a planner, but I hope going deep into my own thoughts, reflecting, and writing them down may help me manifest my wishes and dreams to the Universe, that She may help me achieve them. It's a great coincidence I guess that this year's theme of BDJ Power Planner aligns with my heart's whisper.
On to the flip through?
As always, owner's contact info on the first inside cover page.
I love this manifesto, and it reminded me of a book I got a couple of years ago, Your Illustrated Guide to Becoming One with the Universe by Yumi Sakugawa. I think I need to delve into that book again.
There is value in putting pen to paper, so I am excited to fill out this space for my 2020 Goals. It's also interesting to see what the Krissyfied Solar System will look like after I have tracked my day-to-day moods using different colored pencils.
My Dream Board for my Belle de Jour 2019 Power Planner was filled with nice photos, affirmations, and stickers symbolizing things I wanted to achieve this year and I was able to succeed in getting most of them. I have less than two months to attain the rest, but I am not being too hard on myself in that I won't lose sleep in case I don't get them. ;)
More space for more reflections. I think I'm going to fill these up with my favorite quotes I recently added to my Notes.
I think I'll actually take a stab at filling out my Ikigai for this year.
Every other page in this planner is pretty straightforward, but this section actually left me feeling confused. What am I supposed to do with a law of attraction schedule, and must this schedule be so rigid?
I like jotting down things I am grateful for every day, but I guess I will reserve the Big Things for this section.
More blank space to write on.
I used to write letters to my future self every New Year's Eve and schedule it to be sent out on the following year's New Year's Eve. The company hosting these letters has already folded, but here's a little blast from the past from my email inbox. This letter was written on December 31, 2013, and I received it on December 31, 2014.
Hello.I wish I could remember what I wrote for myself for the following year, but oh well. It didn't happen until later, but I am happy to report to you, past self, that I have indeed let go of bad relationships, and am currently in a relationship where I am loved, secure, and cared for. The Fun. concert didn't happen, but Nate Ruess more than made up for it when he visited Manila for his Grand Romantic tour.
I hope you are safe, loved, healthy, and secure.
I hope that throughout the year, you have: learned how to stick to your guns, let go of bad relationships, learned new things, and get to know this evolving version of yourself much better.
I hope by now you've heard news of Fun. visiting the country for a concert.
Cheers to more experiences!
Be calm.
I love you.
Letters to future selves are fun. I think I will convince J to make a time capsule with me. Aside from a photo from the year we make the time capsule and letters to our future selves, I wonder what else we can put in it. A McDo French Fry?
Manual menstrual trackers are not really helpful to me because I use the Clue app for this already, so I'm not sure if I should just cover it with printed paper for more writing space or just leave it as it is.
Monthly View. I understand the colors are more muted to give a watercolor wash effect (that I loved as I love watercolors!) but I hope they're not that muted because I still want to see color. I veered away from BDJ Power Planners a few years back because I didn't like how saccharine and ~cluttered the pages have become so last year's was definitely an improvement. I wish the washes on this year's pages could have been at least a tad darker.
Nevertheless, as you can see below, the monthly dividers are perfection.
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL!!!
If you used a BDJ Planner this year, this Zappar logo may be familiar to you. It offers more value to the BDJ Power Planners as you just have to use the Zappar app to scan this and the page becomes more interactive! I tried to run the app but was advised it's not available yet, so I will try again come 2020.
Weekly View. It's a little better than the Monthly View, but the watercolor wash could've been a little darker just to provide more contrast.
OF COURSE I had to what the April monthly cover looks like because it's my birth month, and it's a curly girl with books! Just put glasses on her and IT ME!
Aside from the two gold-colored ribbons to mark pages, the BDJ 2020 Power Planner also comes with a magnetic bookmark that's also in theme.
More blank pages for Notes.
Bills Tracker that I need to remember to fill out.
And Cash Flow Tracker that I also need to remember to fill out. J uses a Google Sheet and it has been pretty effective for him in helping him manage and remember where his money goes. I tried to do the same along with several other apps but I always forget to note my expenses down. I should include it in my To Do List every day!
What makes BDJ Power Planners more special are the Perks of a Bella Lifestyle Card and coupons! I always enjoy whipping out my Card to get discounts from partner stores, and I'm excited to do the same next year! For a complete list of this year's accompanying coupons, check out Helen's blog post!
The Belle de Jour 2020 Power Planner also comes in Classic, Limited, and Discbound Editions. Check them out together with Viviamo's other planners in Crazy About Paper and choose how you'll write your 2020. They also make excellent gifts to friends and loved ones. ;)
My Belle de Jour 2020 Power Planner in Leather will be my main planner for 2020, while the 2020 Essentials Planner will serve as my journal. New blank slate, new decade, new possibilities!
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