The day I have been waiting for ever since that sad, sad day in March has come.
"This too shall pass" - that's the mantra I kept on reminding myself while I was dealing with this heartbreak and I am so happy to say that, finally, it has passed.
Photo taken from Team Jimmy's last teambuilding (07 July 2010)
I cannot put my finger on how exactly it happened. All I know is that yesterday, while eating ice cream with him, I realized that I do not feel that heavy feeling of emptiness in my heart anymore. On our way home, while he was driving me to my stop, we joked and laughed like old friends. Like the way we used to. Like the way we were before this (500) Days of Summer-relationship started.
I cannot tell you how many sleepless nights I spent crying, wishing I can turn back time and undo some of the choices I made. I cannot tell you how badly I obsessed about wanting to be loved by him again, how I wanted to bury the pain and ease the loneliness, and how isolating and damaging the depression I felt was. Sorry for being Miss Whine-a-Lot in the past few months. I wouldn't want you guys to think I am a self-harming emo kid in real life. x_x
Seeing the same person who I used to share my days with every day (at work) is difficult, but I guess it also helped me heal. As days passed, my heart began to feel numb and just decided, by herself, that this has got to stop. I think it's much better this way than to not see him for a long time and then feel everything rush to me all over again if in case we meet in the future.
Thanks to this blog (for being a silent witness to everything), my family (for being there no matter what), my friends (for listening to my rants and comforting me even when I was being such a downer), good books (especially Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat Pray Love for taking my mind off things), good movies (the best stress-buster for me), good music (I could just drown in beautiful lyrics and nice rhythms), the Internet and Facebook games (for providing that much needed escape) and YOUR support (you guys are the best, I swear), I was able to pull myself together. Really, I couldn't have done it without you.
Finally I am free, and I feel light as a feather.
Word art from Tumblr
Life is beautiful.
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